Motoring megamouth and Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson turns 48 years old today.
Television presenter, author, part-time historian, quiz show panellist, honorary university alumni, would-be Prime Minister and one of the wittiest people in Britain – Jeremy Clarkson has amused and courted controversy in equal measure.
To celebrate the big man’s birthday, we’ve rounded up his greatest ever quotes.
Are there any we’ve missed? Have you got a favourite?
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On looking at a particularly ugly people carrier..
“How many volts would you have to have pumped through your testicles, before you’d buy that ?
talking about the Jaguar XF “if that comes comes out i will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it.” For which Hammond replied, “do it, make it just make it.”
‘That’s not a car that’s just pornography’- Said about the new Aston Martin
‘He would have walked into the dealership, “Hello”, and they would have shot him.’, Clarkson on James May in the USA.
This car is like herpes, great fun getting it not much fun to live with.
James May turns up with a renault master [van], says he likes the styling, and that it’s chic and quite good looking!
Clarkson: “That ‘s as good looking as a plumber’s bum crack!!”
legend
When he was testing the Zonda(I think) with a witty smile. “We are now shifting from 5th gear into top gear!”. Obviously picking on the other BBC motoring show 5th Gear.
On the handling of the Jag XJ220,
“Our father who art in heaven,
Ill be there in a minuite.”
(On undertaking cars)If there’s enough room for me to undertake then there’s enough room for them to move over in the first place.
Favourite Clarkson quote:
‘I’d rather staple my ears, to a horse’
Genius!!